04-26-2020
There is an African proverb that says, “Smooth sailing does not make a good sailor.”
We will all be good sailors soon with our shared concerns and rough waters of dealing with Covid19 and the tempest of a storm this has been brought upon us all.
I suspect it has been rough for many as they try to navigate these uncharted waters of fear and uncertainty, and far too many are willing to risk their own (and others’) lives, because they have never had to “sit” with themselves in thought.
As a person that has known homelessness at a very young age, abuse, rape and fear of not being able to survive, I’m comfortable being introspective.
It’s safe there, in my head, (at least most of the time), after having been on that other side of certainty and as such, quiet is a welcome sanctuary. I’m convinced that those that allow themselves to “sit” will come away with richness that has nothing to do with money.
For those that have had all their wishes fulfilled, in terms of play and fun, I can see it’s difficult and the push back has become almost psychotic at times.
A man in Arizona has threatened to kill, “the libs,” if they win political offices there. He is being watched at this point by authorities there, but why is the democratic process so scary that someone thinks killing people is okay to protect his rights without regards to the rights of everyone that lives in this county?
What are those rights? Voting is our right and it’s dumbfounding that someone that is screaming about “freedom,” is willing to take someone else’s and in the process, risk loosing that very freedom by going to jail or becoming a dead martyr. That makes no sense, and it lacks the very process of freedom for each and everyone of us in the United States.
Yes, there are those types all over the world, but it is often steeped in anger and violence, and to say you are standing up for the Constitution of the United States, but denying those very rights to those that disagree with them is the antithesis of freedom.
Off my soapbox.
Give me a head with hair, long beautiful hair…
Since a child, I have always had “the hair,” with lots of volume and mostly kept longer. Farrah Facuett had nothing on me, except the stylist.
It wasn’t until about 10 years ago that I cut it short, at Mike's suggestion, and I have loved the wash and go, easy to care for locks of less care.
It was a big leap for me to cut my hair, and when I first did it, I cut it really short, (I still have a small lock of it from when it was long), and I remember wondering if I would be less than if I didn’t have my signature long hair. Of course the answer is that I’m just the same person without the hassle of caring for long hair.
I’ve never looked back, and so if I lose my hair, so be it, as I’ve been assured it will grow back after the chemo stops. Besides, I’ve had fun finding fun hats and scarves that will cover my head if my hair does fall out.
It’s interesting how many times my hair has been brought up during all the planning for chemo, as though it would bother me, and I’m guessing it is a much bigger deal for others than for me. I am concluding that it’s such a false image thing, and one dictated by Madison Ave as a means to sell products and keep woman in a channel that works for them to continue the money trail.
With everyone one at home, and unable to get to their hairdressers, beauty attached to hair might change, but it may also be the driving force for salons to open, long before other businesses. Just something to think about as I eye my scissors and try to remember how my hairdresser does it.
For me and this cancer journey, my biggest concern has been not the getting mouth sores, and the stomach issues. I’m doing all the recommendations to prevent the mouth sores, which includes soft brushing after every meal, followed by Biotene products and as of now, it’s not an issue.
Tummy issues are manageable right now, but not perfect. I’m not nauseous at all, but the lower GI is still not so happy, but it’s mostly just cramps now and then, which I can handle. I have a friend (thank you Francesca Orlando-Baldwin at https://www.healthfullivingsd.com that is a natural nutritionist that suggested a few different things, which just arrived a couple of days ago, and I can tell the difference already, so now my focus is getting solid sleep.
The oncologist’s assistant called yesterday to check in on me and quickly agreed that the fatigue is the big complaint for most. I explained that I wasn’t sleeping well, and she also acknowledged that is a side effect of the Herceptin not the chemo, but the steroid that will be given every time will lead to restless sleep each time.
With the side effect and the steroid, in combination, I will be missing some sleep for the next few months, and plan on naps as needed.
Other side effects so far are extreme dry skin, to which Rose hips oil might be the answer, and seems to be helping, as well as a lack of appetite, making it hard to find things with enough calories and protein to give me the energy I need, but that seems to be getting better now as well.
Rough waters lead to good sailors, and I hope to be sailing though those and into calm waters soon.